Hello folks, this is RG. I’m preparing for a colonoscopy tomorrow. A colonoscopy is when the doctor sticks a camera up your butt to look at your colon. They need to have you cleaned out so they can take a look around.
My instructions for today are liquid diet, and at 2pm take 3 Dulcolax, at 4pm mix 238g of Miralax (that’s 14 doses) into 64 ozs of gatorade or water – drink 10-12 ozs every 15-20m until finished. I’ve guzzled 48 ozs so far and … well nothing yet. Maybe the last 16 ozs will free the beast. Then at 6pm I’ll take 3 more dulcolax.
Interesting to me is that there is nothing in the instructions about protecting my arschenhole from the upcoming onslaught.
I’ve inserted a healthy dose of Preparation H into my bunghole to avoid any irritation. Hemorrhoids are caused by irritation. Irritation is caused by irregularity (constipation or diarrhea). Diarrhea is bound to happen VERY soon. With hemorrhoids, an ounce of prevention is worth a 100 pounds of cure. It is far easier to apply some Preparation H today, than to nurse a hemorrhoid for the next few weeks. I always keep Preparation H in the house, and when I’m irregular, I use it. It’s not just for curing hemorrhoids. I would argue that Preparation H is more useful as a preventative measure against them.
Ok, it’s time for the last glass of sludge (actually, it’s not so bad. I mixed 28 ozs of Gatorade with 36 ozs of water and the 238g of Miralax) and 3 more dulcolax. Any questions let me know. I’ll give an update after the procedure. – RG